At work I had to take a personality test. This test rated me as a “Type 6” “The Loyal Person who defends their team.”
The part of the description of type 6 that had me feeling completely exposed was “Ironically, though Sixes do not trust their own thinking, they are usually incredibly thoughtful and analytical. They are especially excellent troubleshooters because they tend to dwell on worst-case scenarios and are fueled by anxiety. Once committed to their tribe of choice, Sixes are stalwart champions of those they have come to view as family.” Let’s break this down. I over think and analyze a lot, I have a bunch of anxiety, and I am committed to those I care about. I want to focus on the last part of the description for this post. This has me laughing out loud because I think this sums up a big part of my personality. I do not trust easily. If I trust you, it’s because I feel safe and connected with you. Moving as much as I have and going through things I have gone through, it has taught me NOT to trust others. I spent a good few years trying to knock down the wall I built from those instances in order to begin letting others in again as not to completely isolate myself. Therefore, when I’ve decided that I can trust you. And it’s been proven that I can. And I can see that you are someone who is caring and in my corner...I want you and the world to know how amazing I think you are. I am not saying others should be honored that I find them trusting. I am shouting from the mountain tops how blessed I feel that these people have taken their time to include me in their lives and I want everyone to know how special they are. I want everyone to know how God is using them and that the spirit that they carry makes a difference. That THEY make a difference. So I just want to take a moment and dedicate this post to all of those people in my life. I feel extremely blessed lately with so many people I feel that I can trust and turn to for help, guidance, love, and laughter. Thank you for supporting me in my times of need. Thank you for the grace you have given me at my lowest points. Thank you for sharing a smile or a hug every day we see each other. Thank you for all your encouragement and advice. Thank you for inspiring me to learn and grow and be a better person. Thank you for making me feel like family. Thank you for insisting that we ARE family. Thank you for continuing text conversations when they fall at a pause. Thank you for constantly checking in. Thank you for reminding me what I am capable of. Thank you for reminding me that God has blessed me with the light that I carry. Thank you for praying for me and with me. Thank you for taking time out of your busy days to help me. Thank you for late nights chats and answering all my questions. Thank you for pushing me when I debate because I don’t understand. Thank you for your patience when I push because I don’t understand. Thank you for reminding me that I am loved. Thank you for reassuring me time and time again that I am not a burden. Thank you for not ghosting me even though I’m one of those people who send several texts back to back. Thank you for laughing at my jokes and awkward humor. Thank you for accepting me and all my awkwardness. Thank you for loving me and all my awkwardness. Thank you for being my team. My team are those that I am in contact with practically, if not, every day. Or those that I can go periods of time without speaking to and pick up where we left off. I want you to know you are my people. You are my team. You are so cared for and loved and appreciated. Words can never describe how thankful I am for each of you. I feel things deeply and intensely and that includes my love for you all. It may be “odd”, but I don’t care. If we care for someone and see something great in a person, I believe we should ALWAYS tell them! Thank you for being awesome. I am so blessed God is using you in my life. Much love and God bless, -X
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July 2019
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